02/12/2013
Olivia Keeps Her Friends Close and Frenemies Closer
Gigi only told half the truth. She was saying that her mind was so clear, and she felt like she got everything off her chest, but she really didn't. When she talked to Tracy, Gigi made it seem like the only reason I got mad was because of makeup and Gigi talking badly about me to Tracy. In all reality, I would never believe something that Tracy supposedly said. I would never take her word over my friend's word. Ever. I would also never get mad at my friend because she didn't share makeup with me. The makeup was just a little addition to it. The only reason I started questioning things when I heard that Tracy was going around saying that Gigi was talking bad about me was because Gigi would do the same to Tracy. Why would I not believe that?
I left the salon because I wanted to leave the drama. I have people in my life who have never done me wrong. My friendships are really strong because we are really honest with each other. We're going to say what the other one needs to hear. I've been brutally honest with Jackie, as she has been with me. She's like my sister. I'm the same way with Michelle and my other friends who aren't on the show. I have really close relationships with them and I would never, ever say something bad about them behind their backs. What I would talk about were my concerns or worries with a given situation and look for advice—that's what I would vent to Gigi about.
Honestly, I considered Gigi one of my best friends, so when I was upset about something, I confided in her. Why wouldn't I? Tracy did too, and the personal things that Tracy would confide in Gigi about, Gigi would tell me. That made me worry that everything I confided in Gigi about would get told to Tracy. I never wanted to put Gigi in the middle, but she was playing both sides. I didn't like it and backed away.
I even told Gigi, "Tell me one thing that I've ever said bad about Jackie. You can say it to Jackie, because 100 percent, I can put my life on it, I've had the same conversation with her." It's different because Gigi would talk badly about Tracy, like making fun of her. I would never make fun of one of my friends. I have nothing negative to say about my friends. Why would I be friends with them if I didn't like them?
At that point, I didn't know who to believe. All I knew was to go with my gut, and I felt like I couldn't trust Gigi. But I don't want it to seem like I ever wanted Gigi to choose between Tracy and me or that I forced Gigi to express how she really felt about Tracy, because that's not the case at all. If she wanted to have a friendship with me again, then I needed to regain that trust with her. That's all. I can't trust somebody who's going to have a fake friendship with someone. How can you not base your friendship on how another treats their friends?
Meeting up with Tracy definitely wasn't the most comfortable situation. At this point, though, we're fine together. What else am I supposed to argue with her about? I don't care who wore what freakin' gold earrings anymore. I'm over it.
When I went to talk to her, it was obviously a little weird, but I wasn't worried about it. The only thing I was nervous about was that I didn't want her to start questioning me about what Gigi said, because that's not my place. Everything that a friend says to me is in confidence. I am not the person that would ever use something against someone. I'm like a vault. The stuff that Gigi said, that's something she needed to tell Tracy herself. I ended up becoming the middleman, but I'm not going to do that dirty work for Gigi. So, in the most non-incriminating way possible for Gigi, I tried to tell Tracy that she was better off without her.
I didn't think it was a great conversation, but I also didn't leave saying it was a terrible conversation. Tracy asked me to meet her there, and I did. What she is going through with Gigi, questioning Gigi and being upset about their friendship, I already went through that months ago. All that was new for Tracy was old for me. I'm not going to really be emotional over something that I already dealt with emotionally.
